Fundamentally humans need quality connections in order to fulfil the need of belonging in a society where connections can now reach all the way around the world through technology, the internet and social media.
Maslow purposed a “Hierarchy of Needs” which is a psychological theory that describes all of the properties we as humans need in order to survive in our lives. These range from properties of basic survival: food, water etc. all the way to our mental wellbeing and the things that bring us happiness and joy.
The third tier “Love and Belonging” articulates the need for “friendship, family, intimacy, and sense of connection” which tells us that in order to reach our full potential physically and mentally, we need to feel a sense of connection to the people and the world around us.
So, what exactly is a Quality Social Connection?
A quality social connection can be described in many different ways, but I like to explain it as a person whether it be a friend, family member, or colleague, that brings more to your life than they take away from it.
Someone with whom you feel safe and secure, happy around, and who brings a sense of calm to your life.
How can you tell if you have found a Quality Connection in someone?
– You’ll feel excited to see them.
– You won’t feel tired or drained after interacting with them whether it be in person, on the phone, or direct messaging.
– You feel happy when they’re around which can equate to laughter, smiling, and a sense of relief from the world around you.
– They listen to your hardships and offer valuable solutions.
– They are there when you need them in times of crisis no questions asked.
– You feel safe with them like you aren’t being judged or criticized for who you are.
– You can be your true self.
Quality connections are important for our mental health as it gives us a sense of belonging and understanding.
It allows us to learn from other people how to interact socially, learn new lessons about the world around us, as well giving a sense of closeness and connection that we need in order to thrive in our lives. Without quality connections we would feel lonely, despondent, and isolated in our lives.
It’s a basic human instinct to want to belong and “fit in” with those around us.
The quality of the connections we make will either make or break our overall wellbeing and if constantly associated with people whom we don’t feel secure with, it can contribute to feelings of depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and low self-confidence.
Surround yourself with people who give more than they receive, that make you feel wanted and loved, and most importantly, let you be YOU!
By: Meagan Weniger | Social Anxiety Mentor
The Socially Awkward Normie 